


Fatigue

by hamburr_fangirl



Series: Random Hamilton Oneshots [12]
Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Author Is Sleep Deprived, Depression, Exhaustion, M/M, depressed aaron burr
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-27
Updated: 2018-05-27
Packaged: 2019-05-14 13:04:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 336
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14770157
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hamburr_fangirl/pseuds/hamburr_fangirl
Summary: Fatigue is different than when you're tired. Tired is when you know sleeping will make you feel better. But fatigue is still there when you wake. It stays with you all day. It is a lack of energy, a feeling of mental, physical and emotional exhaustion.And it doesn't go away.





	Fatigue

He feels empty. He doesn't know why and he definitely doesn't know how to fix it. After all these years of feeling nothing but bone deep exhaustion, he has learned to just accept that this feeling is all he is going to know.

He can't really being himself to care about that fact. He can't bring himself to care about much these days.

He sighs as he stares at the blank wall. He can only see shadows of the furniture placed around his room. Distantly, he takes note of the mess on his floor and thinks that he should clean that up tomorrow.

He knows he won't, but he thinks it anyways.

Biting at his chapped lips, he rolls over slightly and grabs his phone, checking for notifications. It's stupid. Why would he have any at this late hour? Only people like him stay up past midnight and he knows none of his friends feel the same way as he does.

He briefly considers texting his boyfriend, but ultimately decides against it. There would be no point. Alexander can't do anything about this emptiness inside him. A text will only cause him to worry in the morning and make him feel guilty for not being there for him.

Aaron doesn't want that. Alexander shouldn't have to feel that way. It isn't his job to look after him like he was a child.

He blinks a few times to get the drowsiness out of his eyes. The screen of his phone glares back at him and he turns the device off, placing it back on the bedside table.

He rolls to face the wall again. He continues to gnaw at his lips as he tries to force himself to sleep. It doesn't work. It never works.

It only takes an hour before he gives up. He snatches his phone and goes into the internet to continue reading a book.

All he has to is wait until exhaustion forces him to sleep. That is all he can do.


End file.
